Dimensions 003 – Reversing imposter syndrome
How to make the most out of sucking at something and being a beginner
Hi friend, thanks for checking in here with me today. I feel very inspired to write these letters to you all every once in a while. I hope you’ll enjoy this one, I’ll dive into something we’re probably all familiar with: imposter syndrome (and how to kick it).
Even after more than 15 years of experience, I’m still going to be a beginner at certain aspects of my craft. There is always more to learn, deeper levels to master. And yes, I too fall prey to the trap of the ever-dreaded Imposter Syndrome. I think I’ve found a way to not let it hold me back, though. Even more so, I’ve found a way to flip it around and to use it as motivation to push forward when it arises.
In the end, it’s an ego issue, right? The things we’re already good at, what’s tried and true, that’s safe. The comfort zone. You’re untouchable here (ok, apart from other insecurities maybe). Anything that’s slightly new to you is ‘unsafe’, or rather: unknown. The paradox is that you’ll never be really good at something that you don’t suck at, first. The only way is through, feel the fear and do it anyway and -insert other quotes you’ve heard a thousand times before-.
The Gap
There’s also this thing called The Gap. If you’ve heard of it before, this refers to the gap between your taste and your capabilities at any given point in your journey. The better you get, your taste will also shift forward, so this gap never closes. It’s the carrot on the stick. I think there’s another gap: the gap between your competence in the thing you’ve been doing for a long time and your ability to do the thing that is rather new to you. You’ve spent thousands of hours, if not the famous 10,000 hours (as outlined in Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell) to master something, and now you have to start all over again with something new. Oh, no!
Jack of all trades
Fortunately for you, not so fortunate for your persistent imposter syndrome, it has already been proven that learning many different things makes you more skilled at learning (yes, the skill of learning itself, which is important), and being a Jack of all trades makes you a better specialist in the end. This may seem contradictory, but hear me out. There was a study published in 2016 by the American Orthopaedic Society for Sports Medicine that stated that young athletes who performed many different types of sports regularly were actually more likely to reach elite status in one sport than their specialised counterparts that focused on mastering one sport and one sport only. The ones that put in their 10,000 hours burnt out more quickly, were less well-adapted in general and made less progress over time than the multi-athletes. Most of us have grown up learning that we have to “specialise to be special”, but it’s simply not true.
Adulting is a lie
Now, I’d like to present you with another thing: nobody actually knows what they’re doing. ‘Adults’ are not actually a real thing, professionals are just people who managed to create something of value for others with doing and making stuff. Their stuff sucked at first, heck, it might still suck today to your standards. There might be another gap here: your taste being the highest, followed by your capabilities just below that, and then people who are even less capable than you. Here’s the thing: you don’t have to be the absolute best to succeed! Not at all. If it’s valuable to at least one person, you’re solid. A bit more than one if you’d like to make it your profession, but you see my point. So then, seeing people succeed with work that is ‘sub-par’ according to your standards should not infuriate you, in fact it should encourage you. If that work is absolutely IT to someone, what you have to offer will for sure resonate with someone as well.
Reversing imposter syndrome
At this point you might still be wondering how to ‘reverse’ imposter syndrome and make it work for you. Of course try to remember that doing anything new and going through those beginning stages, makes you better at everything else you’re already good at and everything else you would want to try in the future. The only way is up, even if the results may not show it right away – keep in mind that anything tangible or trackable is not the only outcome. Then, be Pippi Longstocking. Know that there’s just as much reason to believe you can actually do something than there is to believe you don’t. You have never done it before, the world is your oyster.
“I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that.” – Pippi Longstocking
You can invite the feeling of being an imposter in a positive way when you think of it this way. You’re totally playing the system and the people. It’s day 2399 and they suspect nothing. They think you know what you’re doing, because they don’t know what they’re doing. And someone may even pay you for it, ha! All while you’re just winging it. More like winning it, amirite? Being an esteemed expert is an overrated, late stage capitalistic ideal. Being an accidentally successful nitwit is the new black.
The biggest fear, of course, is in actually being ‘found out’. Or letting yourself down, or a combination of the two. I’m going to repeat once more that nobody knows what they’re doing and nobody will hold you to the immensely high standard your imposter syndrome will try to convince you of. Secondly, there’s probably yet another gap between your capabilities and taste, and the level of expectations on the receiving end. If they put their trust in you, you can then trust that what you will come up with will be of their liking. Thirdly, if you do mess up, know that you’re just a lil guy, and it’s your first day. You’re allowed to mess up, it’s part of life, not the end of the world.
As you’ve seen in the images throughout this post, doing something for the first time without really knowing how I would pull it off, led me to photographing a cookbook without ever having done any noteworthy food photography. It made me say ‘yes’ to shooting an international campaign on film before I ever even shot a roll of film before that day. When I did buy my first film camera, I convinced a car dealership to let me photograph some of their coolest cars without any track record of car photography. It made me follow through with shoots that I may have never even considered if I let the imposter syndrome win, which ended up making some of my best portfolio work. Now go out and try something new. Suck at something. Or surprise yourself, just see.
Now for the ‘news’ section of this newsletter: I will be selling some prints (one of which has that cool Jag E-Type on it that you saw earlier, and more) during the photography market at Werkplaats Amsterdam (on the ground floor of the Volkshotel) on the 26th of November, from 12 to 6pm. The entrance is free, there’s affordable art and cool artists to hang out with, so come around!
Love this whole issue! And that Pippi quote is so good!